Just Another Demigod
by kaworu nagisa
Summary: Charlotte Alverez - your average Mary-Sued daughter of Hades.  Offering services to irritate Nico di Angelo at any time, any place.  Service is free.


**A/N – **this is called a freakin' rewrite of a story.

To those who actually noticed the change in penname, hi(: I decided I liked this penname tons better than my old one, which was just clichéd and . . . ugh. This one comes from a Harry Potter quote, so kudos to you people who actually pick it up! ~

So I've actually been working on my writing a lot, I got some of it published, and I came back to fanfiction to rectify the horrible fics I have on my profile. /shudders/ I tend to be more into serious fanfic writing now, so this will be my one and only humour piece, unless I continue _Camp Mary Sue._ Hmm . . .

Those who don't know me – hello(: my name is Isabelle. I'm thirteen, from Singapore, and I love writing ohsoverymuch that you'll never believe it. I used to be a wannabe daughter of Athena, but I'm proud to say that I've moved on from that phase, though PJO was and always will be a very important part of my life.

People who still keep track of my other stories – I'm writing the next chapter of _Somewhere in Time_! I'd advise you to go read that, it's one of my only fics that's worth reading . . . screw _What The Door Conceals, _I'm deleting that.

But enough of my babbling, so here's the story :D oh and review. Of course review(; that's one part of me that will never change. I will always be a review hog ~

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><p>Just Another Demigod<br>by **crackin' keeper**

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><p>Chapter One – <em>Introducing Charlotte Alverez<em>  
>[ also known as our heroine; Nico's annoying sister; and daughter of Hades ]<p>

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><p><strong>i.<strong>  
>Charlotte Alverez was your average demigod.<p>

She was ADHD, practically illiterate, and outstandingly annoying. But Charlotte wasn't one to blend into the background, and most of it was due to the fact that she was a daughter of Hades. At camp. Most children of Hades spent their entire lives outside camp, roaming the Underworld and being emo.

Also, she was _that_ girl, the boisterous one who spoke in a loud voice and made obnoxious comments about other people. She was probably the most irritating demigod alive; horribly cheery all the time; perpetually bouncy; and couldn't wield a sword to save her life. All in all, a nutcase that couldn't and would never be cracked.

But apart from that, she was mostly average, and there was nothing that set her apart as _Charlotte Alverez._

Apart from maybe one teensy tiny detail.

"CHARLOTTE MARIE ALVEREZ, I'M GOING TO KILL YOU!"

She loved to irritate her half-brother Nico.

**ii.**  
>"Get out of bed," Nico said wearily after his dramatic entrance into the Hades cabin. All the force seemed to have gone from his bluster. "I came down here straight after Lou Ellen told me you didn't want to come down to lunch because of that stupid . . . thing. Hurry up, now." He tugged gently on the sheets that Charlotte had tucked up to her chest.<p>

Charlotte Alverez, if anything, looked completely different from her half-brother, with bleached blonde hair and bright blue eyes. She sighed dramatically and curled her legs into her chest. "Go away, Nico," she whispered. "Stay out of my cruel, cruel life – _HEY!_"

Nico had yanked the black duvet, hard, out of her grasp and now she was lying on the bed minus the bedclothes, which, of course, was horribly uncomfortable. "Get up."

"YOU KILLED PEDRO!" she screamed at him. "You have _no right_ to tell me what to do when you _killed_ him."

At the mention of the name, Nico immediately looked uncomfortable. He shifted on the balls of his feet. "I _told_ you not to leave him alone with me while I was chanting . . . he was too close! I didn't mean to vaporize him!"

"Oh, you _didn't_?" Charlotte's eyes were dangerously bright and she snatched back her blanket. "It's all . . . your . . . fault . . . " she choked out, and flopped back down onto the bed. Nico rolled his eyes. His half-sister had always been one for dramatics.

"Charlotte, he's gone. Get over it. At least he's in Elysium, right . . . ? I streamlined his application process . . . oh come on, Charlotte. He wasn't even your boyfriend." Nico tried to reason.

"We were close," Charlotte's voice was muffled because she had her face pressed into the comforter.

Nico's impatience was starting to show through the cracks. "Charlotte, he was a _hamster._"

"Pedro . . . " she moaned, eyes filling with tears. "Oh, darkened sky! Oh, terrifying evil! Oh, cruel world, what will do I have to live . . . ?"

"They're serving baked potatoes skins with bacon bits today. Low fat, of course."

"Ooh!" Charlotte sat bolt upright in bed. "Really?"

"No. I lied." Then, on seeing her downcast face and sighing, Nico went on, "_of course_ really. Who lies about such boring things?"

"You do," said Charlotte, shrugging. "But then again, you're emo. I'm not. In fact, no other kid of Hades is. You're just plain emo goth depressed _slit-my-wrists_ type – "

"Shut up, Charls."

**iii.**  
>"AAH! OH FUCKING HELL THAT HURTS LIKE SHIT!"<p>

Nico burst into the Hades cabin, eyes flashing, sword drawn. "_Charls!_ Who or what – " then when he saw that there was only her in the cabin, he sighed in relief. "Oh, thank the gods. I thought you were being attacked – " then his eyes came into focus, and they narrowed. "What in the _world_ are you doing, Charlotte Alverez?"

Sitting with her feet kicked up on her desk, toes dripping blood, a half-contorted expression of pain on her face and a bloody ink-stained safety pin in her hand, Charlotte tried to grin. "Um, giving myself a pedicure?"

**iv.**  
>Sitting sulkily on her bunk bed, Charlotte wriggled her purple toes and winced. They were still sore from that day's previous incident, and she could still see traces of the ink on them. <em>Charlotte A,<em> one toe for each letter. She'd managed one round of self-attempted tattooing before Nico arrived and made her scrub them off, which of course hurt like anything as well. Stabbing herself with the pin and further irritating the wounds by dripping ink in them was probably the worse thing she had ever done to herself, apart from when she tried to pierce her nose with a badge and ended up impaling her upper lip. (It was still swollen, and always would be.)

"I hope you've learnt your lesson," sighed Nico as he strode into the room, placing a tall glass of milkshake mixed with nectar on her bedside table – his specialty. He'd grown accustomed to making it because Charlotte was always doing these type of things to herself.

"I only wanted a tattoo," grumbled Charlotte. "You said I couldn't go to a tattoo parlor."

"Charls, for Zeus' sake, you're _thirteen._ And just because you wanted a tattoo doesn't mean you had to do it yourself, with an un-sterile pin that's crawling with germs and with _pen_ ink." Nico paused for the meaning of his words to sink in. Charlotte raised an eyebrow. "_Pen ink,_ Charls!"

"What? I was desperate." She waved an arm dismissively. He only tapped the glass with a nail, creating a ringing sound that echoed in the cabin.

"Yeah, I can tell. Drink up, Charlotte."

She lifted the glass to her lips and took a long sip, during which he simply rolled his eyes and stalked from the room, tired of her antics. Once he was gone she started plotting – she had to get back at him _somehow._

A lock of her hair fell into her face, and she blew it away impatiently. It ended up swinging back to its previous position, and furiously she tucked it behind her ear, irked that it had the nerve to disobey her.

Suddenly, an idea struck her, and slowly, an evil grin began spreading across her face.

**v.**  
><em>Attempt Number 243.,<em> Charlotte wrote neatly and clearly in her journal. She kept track of the things she did to drive Nico up the wall, so that she would never do the same thing twice and hence be called unoriginal – the _horror_! – and so yeah.

In the two years that she'd lived with him, only two attempts had actually been successful, Attempts number 88 and 157. 88 had consisted of a huge lump of cow manure and a catapult, and 157 required a grease-covered pig, lots of mud, and three types of dung. Both hadn't been pretty, and Nico stank for a week – _so_ not adding to his sex appeal – but hey, they'd worked, and that's what Charlotte considered most important.

_Attempt Number 243 – Blond hair._

Slowly, laboriously, she went about the task of mixing the dye, taking special care to be extra silent so that Nico wouldn't notice. At one point in time, when she was whisking the mixture ferociously like a ninja, he snorted a little and rolled over. Charlotte stiffened; ever-so-slowly she was edging the bowl towards the window; but her brother was still fast asleep, turning over and once more relaxing into slumber. Charlotte exhaled, and she knelt carefully by her brother's head, wooden board in one hand, bowl of dye in the other. The smell of the dye was pungent and she was half-afraid he would awake because of it, but Nico di Angelo was still happily in dreamland.

Slowly, carefully, she lifted a lock of dark hair onto her board, held it horizontally, and holding her breath, began to paint.

**vi.**  
>"CHARLOTTE MARIE ALVEREZ!"<p>

Charlotte jolted awake, limbs flailing precariously. She had _not_ fallen asleep. She had _not _fallen asleep. Because if she had, it would be too late to wash of the dye, and the hair . . .

. . . oh gods, too late.

Charlotte started working her way backwards so quickly she slammed into the base of her bunk bed with an _oof_. Because, standing before her, murder in his eyes, was Nico di Angelo.

With green hair.

". . . oops?" Charlotte hazarded with a weak smile, scrambling to stand. Nico was fuming, his eyes were blazing, and his fists were clenched, one on the hilt of his sword. Charlotte's eyes widened. _Watch the sword, watch the sword . . . _he seemed angrier than she had ever seen him, and she knew that she'd crossed the line by far that time.

"_CHARLOTTE_!" he yelled again, in frustration and anger. Charlotte backed away, positively frightened by his tone of voice.

"It was an accident!" she said hurriedly, holding her hands before her defensively. "It was supposed to be blond, not green – "

"BLOND?" If possible, Nico seemed even angrier. "YOU ARE _SO_ DEAD NOW, DON'T YOU RUN – "

Charlotte squeaked and tried to make a wild dash for the doorway, but Nico caught her easily and hauled her back. "It was an accident!" she squealed. "An accident, Nico, an accident!"

"Change my hair back." His voice was low and menacing, the threat in it obvious. "_Now._"

"I can't!"

"Change it back _now_ or you'll be very, very sorry, I guarantee you."

Gulping, Charlotte's flailing limbs made a wild gesture at the desk, snatching the box off the wood. Trembling, she held it to her eyes, scanned it in great detail and taking a ridiculous amount of time, before whimpering and looking back to him. "It'll . . . it'll take a week for the dye to wear off."

"A _week?_" his eyes flashed dangerously.

"Uh," said Charlotte, "yeah."

"CHARLOTTE!"

"Yes, dear brother?"

"Fix my hair."

"Fine. I'll take you to Mr. D to have your hair fixed."

"Nuh-uh." He tapped a foot against the ground. "I'm not moving out of this cabin till my hair's back to normal."

"Do you want your hair fixed or not?"

**vii.**  
>Ten minutes later, Nico stood before her with a brown paper bag inverted over his head, with two holes with jagged edges so that he could see through. It hid most of the green hair, but unfortunately, it also hid most of his face and made him look ridiculous.<p>

"Hey, that could be a new look for you!" Charlotte exclaimed, trying to sound upbeat and failing miserably. "You know, you're rocking it . . . "

Nico glared at her through the two holes that revealed his eyes. She blanched and quickly tried to cover up.

"Um, it works a lot better than the emo look did, anyway," she continued, circling him like a predator. " . . . and the green hair goes with it!"

Nico growled. Wrong thing to say, obviously.

" . . . you should try this more often?"

"Charlotte," Nico sighed through his nose, "I am a child of Hades, and children of Hades are not emo. We are simply . . . "

"Emo."

" . . . challenged in the art of expression." Nico mused. "And we wear black a lot. It's just our colour."

"You are and always have been emo, my brother," said Charlotte dramatically. "That's why you wear tight skinny jeans and black hoodies and black Converse hi-tops so that you can display how gay and truly emo you are – "

Nico made another growling sound, but Charlotte ignored him.

" – and as I was saying, even your name is emo."

"My _name_?" Nico seemed on the verge of strangling her, and was visibly restraining himself.

"You know, Nico di _Angelo_. The angel thing, is like, so, so, so totally emo."

"The last time I had a sister, she wasn't half as annoying." Nico sighed.

"It's just my charm," Charlotte said lightly, but she turned away, averting her gaze. She knew – everyone at camp knew – that Bianca di Angelo was a very sensitive topic for Nico, and that he could go ballistic or worse, dissolve into tears. Bianca had been twelve when she died, for a Mythomagic statuette of Hades. That was the year that Nico finally grew up.

"And then again, my name is _so_ not daughter of Hades type," she continued, in an equally cheery voice. "I mean, Charlotte Alverez? Does that sound deep and dark and gothic in the least? You'd think I was, like, _Heidi._"

"Whatever." Nico rolled his eyes and tugged on the paper bag over his head. "Are you going to fix my hair now?"

"We're going to _Mr. D_ to fix your hair," Charlotte corrected.

"What. Ever."

**viii.**  
>"Chiron, please say that you're going to expel Charls."<p>

Nico's eyes were wide and pleading, but Chiron merely gave him an appraising look and rocked back and forth on his heels – or hooves. "Now, Nico, that wouldn't exactly be a very nice thing to do."

"Nice? _Nice?_ Who cares about being nice, she freaking dyed my hair blue!"

"It's _green_."

"Shut up, Charls. And now you're saying Mr. D won't be back for a week? What? I have to walk around with green hair for a _week_? Chiron, please – "

"Nico, you can't just expel your sister – fine, half-sister for a _prank._ It wasn't even a very serious offence."

"Green. Hair."

"Nico . . . " Chiron sighed.

Nico rolled his eyes and leaned back on the rear legs of his chair. "It isn't even funny to me. I've been bearing with her for _two_ years, and she's dyed my hair blue – "

"_Green._"

" – and you won't even expel her! What is this nonsense?"

Charlotte perked up. "Hey, Nico, what's that green thing on the back of your chair?"

Horror dawned on him. "Hades, that's my hair!"

"Hey! We rhymed."

"I don't freaking care."

"Rhymed again!"

"Chiron, she's more than I can bear!"

"Rhymed again!"

"If you want her to stay, this burden – we must _share._"

"Rhymed again!"

"Not fair!"

"Rhymed again!"

"Don't. You. Dare."

"Ha!"

"_Chiron!_"

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><p><strong>AN** – quick note here. Apologies if Nico's OOC, I'm very bad at writing about him. Leave me your thoughts, please? :3


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